Yo momma so dumb, she tried to surf the microwave
Me: Would you like to be the sun in my life?
Her: Awww… Yes!!!
Me: Good then stay 92.96 million miles away from me
Teacher: How much is a gram?
Tyronne: Uhmm, depends on what you need
Why are frogs always so happy? They eat what ever bugs them
Some guy called me a tool. So I got hammered and nailed his girlfriend. Guess he was right.
I went down the street to a 24-hour grocery store. When I got there, the guy was locking the front door. I said, “Hey! The sign says you’re open 24 hours.” He Said, “Yes, but not in a row!”
Yo mama is so ugly she made my happy meal cry
I couldn’t figure out why the baseball kept getting larger. Then it hit me.
Boy: The principal is so dumb!
Girl: Do you know who I am?
Girl: I am the principal’s daughter!
Boy: Do you know who I am?
Boy: Good! *Walks away*
Beer Bottle: You break me, you get 1 year of bad luck!
Mirror: You kiddin’ me? You break me, then y’all get 7 years bad luck!
Condom: Hahaha… (Condom walks off laughing)
Yo mama so fat, she doesn’t need internet, she’s already worldwide.